An Open Letter to the Girl with Vitiligo Wondering if Anyone Will Ever Love Her Spots
To the girl with vitiligo wondering if anyone will ever love her spots:
I’ve been living with vitiligo for the past 24 years. I noticed my first white spots when I was six years old. The spots started on my eyelids and quickly spread all over my body. I’ve seen numerous doctors, been through years of light treatments, and tried every self-tanner out there. But it never stopped spreading.
Today, as a 30-year-old, 95% of my body has been de-pigmented. Now only a few brown spots are found splattered throughout my back and abdomen. If you were to see me today you would never think I had vitiligo unless I was wearing a two-piece swim suit. But for some reason, the insecurities have always stayed with me.
As a girl with vitiligo, dating has never been easy – I’m sure many can relate. I dated a couple of guys here and there but never really felt comfortable in my skin around them. Until I met my current boyfriend.
It wasn’t until meeting Trevor that I truly felt comfortable with my skin. We met while playing intramural volleyball and I originally had tried to set him up with my little sister, but had too big of a crush to let him go. Fast forward a little over two years and I couldn’t ask for a better partner.
I’ll never forget the first time Trevor noticed my spots. We were hanging out and he wanted to scratch my back and started to pull the back of my shirt up. Keep in mind, I have a big brown spot that resembles a butterfly on my back. I was immediately embarrassed and insecure because I didn’t want him thinking I had anything wrong with me and wasn’t sure how he would react. But it didn’t faze him at all and he just said, “I love your butterflies,” and hugged me. I was so happy. It was the first time that I didn’t need to hide my spots. I didn’t even need to explain vitiligo. I realized he didn’t care what was on my back. He loves me for everything that I am.
As cliché as it sounds, my advice is to find a guy who makes you feel good inside and out. One that makes you want to wear a two-piece to show off that rockin’ body. One that makes you laugh until you can’t breathe. One that challenges you to be strong and confident. One that supports and listens. One that loves your own “butterflies.”
Living Dappled is a blog for girls and by girls with vitiligo - and that means that guest and contributing bloggers are a big part of our voice within the vitiligo community. To submit a blog for consideration, use the "Contribute" form found at the bottom of our website.
Giving = Loving
Living Dappled remains free and takes hours every month to publish, and almost a thousand dollars a year to maintain.If you find joy and value in this community, please consider supporting the blog with a gift. No gift is too small and every contribution will help us in our mission to lift up the vitiligo community through awareness and support.